Wednesday, 1 April 2015

स्याह निशान 

30-03-2015
20:04

पता नहीं कब कैसे उसकी बाँयी बाँह पर कोहनी के ऊपर किसी भोथर कोने से चोट  लगी और उस जगह चवन्नी सा बड़ा निशान उभर आया। उसने उस निशान पड़े जगह को उंगलियों के पोरों से दबाया। उसे हल्का सा दर्द महसूस हुआ। सर झटक वह पुन: परीक्षा की उत्तरपुस्तिकाओं को जाचँने में जुट गई। 

पर, दर्द हर बार दस्तकें देता रहा जब जब, उसकी सहशिक्छिकाओं  ने उस स्याह निशान पर प्रश्नों की लम्बी कतार लगाई-
"ये क्या है, कैसे लगी, कहाँ लगी, कब लगी? कैसे चलती हो? जरा सभँल कर चला करो।"

हर प्रश्न के साथ स्मृतिचिह्नों के सुदूर प्रांतों की यात्रा प्रारंभ होती और तत्क्षण ही दूसरे प्रश्न पर समाप्त होती। 

अंतत: उसने ऊबे से लहजे में कह डाला,  "कहाँ, क्यूँ, कैसे लगी? कमरे की चारदीवारी के कोने से टकराते रहती हूँ , और क्या? उसी में कहीं लग गयी होगी और निशान पड गए।"

सबके प्रश्न जबान से हट आँखों में सिमट तो गए पर उसके उत्तर पर टीके टिप्पणियों की बौछारें होने लगी- इतने तल्ख जवाब किसने मांगे थे? सीधे से कह देती कि कोने से चोट लग गयी थी।"  

उसने स्याह पड़े निशान पर अपने आँचल के पल्लू को फैला कर ढक दिया। 

























Saturday, 14 March 2015

Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day
Valentine's Day
14-02-2015
09:13
Love is in the air today, just for today and tomorrow it will be buried in the humdrums of life as like any other Days celebrated nation wide.
Read today that 'Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.'
But, love, in our society, is still a hush-hush matter. People have the audacity to condemn love, punish love, however pure it may be, but lack the courage to accept and share it.
Yes, we are people and we prefer to be people all through our life forgetting our individual self because the insecurity of losing our dear ones looms large over our inhibited love. Those, who have the courage, are either the rebels or the lowly ones.
We all have read about Platonic Love, named after that great philosopher, Plato. To quote him- "Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back. Those who wish to sing always find a song. At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet."
Plato, it seems you sang a song too, incomplete and that made you the great philosopher. So, Tulsidas too and many other poets, artists and philosophers. Their love was really Platonic, sublime. You all didn't love but you managed to sustain your love through your creativity and creations. Hats off to your undaunted spirit and love!

Sunday, 25 January 2015

The Snakes

Whenever she teaches the poem ‘The Snake’ by D H Lawrence, the scene of snakes, lying crushed and smashed in the courtyard of the government bunglow at Digwadih, comes alive to her mind, making her wonder at the lines-

“The voice of education said to me /He must be killed,...”

They were all of blackish green colour, spread all around in the courtyard. Some were on the drainage and some creeping on the cobbled floor of the courtyard. They were seven-eight in number. She stood transfixed on the stairs of the verandah. She had never seen snakes at such a close distance. Perhaps they had come from the cowshed which was at one side of the courtyard or from the drainage with its outlet near the backdoor of the courtyard. She wanted to run but the fear or say, fascination kept her rooted on the stairs. She wanted to scream but the voice was choked in her throat.

However, the sound of approaching footsteps gave her some courage and a small, stiffled cry escaped her lips. Her brothers were the first to arrive from the drawing room. She waved her small hands at them to stop and then pointed towards the snakes. Their eyes widened with surprise. Till then, her mother had come out from the store room. Finding snakes in the courtyard, she first, picked her by her arms and put her down at the far end of the verandah, giving out a shout at the same time, "Shivlal, Shivlal, bring a lathi. Quick… run fast.” Without waiting for him, she found a lathi and hit the snakes, one at a time. Half of them had already left through the drainage to the thicket behind the bunglow. With some efforts, she managed to kill four of them all by herself.  Standing there in the courtyard, with a lathi in her hand to protect her children, her mother seemed to have taken the form of Chandi Avatar. The courtyard had become the graveyard of snakes. They looked so ominous in the fading light of twilight. The mugginess of the summer evening had deepened.

Her father, a deeply religious man, came rushing straight from the office, hearing about the incident from Shivlal who had run fast to give this piece of news to his Shahab. He asked for the torch. Her elder brother brought the torch and handed it to him. He threw light over the dead snakes. The skin gleamed in the torchlight. Instantly he shouted at my mother, “ Ahh…chchch, how come you kill these snakes of Lord Shiva? They are the garden snakes-Harhara snakes, the non-poisonous ones. Ghor paap ho gaya. You have committed a sin. You’ll have to go through purgation to cleanse your soul from this sin.”

He, then, took a bath and went to the puja room. There he prayed before Lord Shiva for forgiveness that the sin was committed unknowingly in sheer ignorance. Meanwhile, they all kept standing there in the verandah with Albatross round their neck, as instructed by him.  After the prayer, he came out with Gangajal and asked them to stand in a line. Chanting “apavitro pavtrai  bhav:”, he sprinkled Gangajal on all and told them to take bath.

That night, she could not sleep. Her dreams were invaded by Harhara snakes. She saw them sliding all around, everywhere flickering their tongue in and out.

She had read about snakes that they are poisonous. Snakebite can kill anyone. She wondered,” How brave is her mother!  She has no fear of snakes. How bravely she killed the snakes!” Her gaze kept shifting from her mother to snakes. She was too young to understand that some snakes are not poisonous. She had seen snakes around the neck of Lord Shiva in the picture in puja room. She had also seen Krishna dancing on the large multiple swinging heads of Kaliya in Amar Chitra Katha. She had read about the death of Bahula’s husband by snakebite in Pauranik Katahayen and a lot more about snakes that they sip milk from a bowl on Nag Panchami, that some snakes are two-mouthed, some can fly too, some are Manidhari, some carry a large Ruby on their heads, some stay post as the guards of hidden treasure, some are Ichchadhari Naags and many more. She became quite muddled about those stories.

 A few days later, there came a snake charmer with a cotton sling bag on his shoulder. She was playing with her brothers in the lawn. The snake charmer put down his bag on the pavement and took out two cane baskets from it. He then opened the lid of the baskets and started playing his flute. She took a step back in fear when she saw a pair of snakes swaying from side to side on the tune of the flute. They were like the one around Lord Shiva’s neck. She could make little sense of the juxtaposition of those stories related to snakes. The only thing she could feel was that snakes do look repulsive. Their bite can kill anyone. so, they must be killed.


Next day, when her brothers asked her to play Snake and Ladder in the afternoon, she firmly refused them. Snakes, poisonous or non-poisonous, give her the creeps. 

Sunday, 28 December 2014

प्रतीक्षा विहीन शामों से कहीं ज्यादा तकलीफदेह इंतज़ार भरी शाम हुआ करती है क्योंकि इंतज़ार धीरे धीरे शाम से रात में बदल जाती है जो उम्र सी लम्बी हो जाती है फिर मुरदे सी पथरा जाती है। 

Saturday, 23 August 2014

शेष स्मिृतियाँ 


उसने अधनींदी अवस्था में ही अपने हाथों को फैला अपने चारों ओर टटोला। शैय्या के बीच स्वयं को पा कर उचटी नींद को पुनः लाने का प्रयास किया। पर मुंदी आँखों में कुछेक स्मृतियाँ दस्तक देने लगी। बचपन में वह अक्सर ही बिस्तर से लुढक जाया करती थी। पर वो दो जोड़े हाथ उसे वापस बिस्तर पर डाल दिया करते, उनकी धीमी-धीमी थपकी उसे पुनः सुला दिया करती थी। अधनींदी में उसने उन थपकियों को महसूस करना चाहा।
वह ना गिरे- इसलिए माँ उसे दोनों भाइयों के बीच या दीवार की तरफ सुलाती थी। पर कभी-कभी, छोटी-छोटी बातों पर भाइयों से कट्टी कर लेना उसे महंगा पड़ जाता था। रेल गाड़ी में भी इक दफा वो ऊपर की बर्थ से मध्य रात्रि में नीचे रखे बक्से पर जा गिरी। तब से माँ उसे ऊपर की बर्थ पर सुलाती तो दोनों सिक्कड़ के बीच के खुले हिस्से को मोटे फीते या रस्सी से घेर देती। जाने क्या जादू था उन हाथों में कि उनके स्पर्श से, उनके थाम लेने मात्र से ही सारी चोट भर जाया करती थी !
अब न तो वो बिस्तर के सुरक्छित किनारे हैं न ही थामने वाले हाथ...बस एक पसराव है, स्मृतियाँ शेष है.…    

Saturday, 9 August 2014

STILL LIFE

With heavy steps, she closes the gate of her car. Slinging the hand bag on her shoulder and carrying the carry bag of lunch-box and water bottle, she comes to the lift, opens the gate and is about to close, she hears the footsteps of someone. A face peeks out at her. Her hand, about to press the ‘On’ button, stops with a jerk, and she opens the gate for her neighbour to enter the lift. Her neighbour enters with a carry bag full of groceries and vegetables, puts down the bag on the lift floor, closes the gate and presses the key for 4th floor. They have the same destination but none of them speak. The lift seems heavy. Silence speaks a lot with the sound of lever and pulley. While the lift goes up, she looks at the closed doors of each floor. She reads the name plates. The sun is about to set behind the tall buildings. It is getting dark inside the lift too. So, she switches on the light. But the dim light of the CFL is insufficient to lift the approaching darkness which hangs on to their sealed lips. The lift stops with a slight jerk at the 4th floor. Her neighbour opens the gate and they both come out of the lift. The stagnated silence lifts up with the unlocking sound of their doors.

Thursday, 17 July 2014

शब्द, विचार, कूंची, रंग, चित्रपट्टी- ये बेवफा हैं या मैं ?
इनके बिना मेरा अन्तः बंजर भूमि सा प्रतीत होता है। कैसे इनका पुनरोपण करूँ या ये स्वतः रोपित होंगे ? नकारा सा महसूस होने लगा है।
दिन और रात ठंडी चाय के घूँट की तरह हलक में उतरते जा रहे हैं और मैं जश्न के बाद उतरते तिरपाल और फ़ानूसों के बीच उन व्यस्त पलों को बिखरे पसरे कपडे औ सामान की तरह सहेजते जा रही हूँ...