DRIFTING CLOUDS

I had been to Bangalore in this autumn break. After seeing off my eldest son (he went to Germany), Shammi (my youngest one) and I had a nice time together. Then 20th Oct. arrived, the day to make my return trip. This time luckily I got the window seat. So, less disturbance from co-passengers and moreover I could enjoy the scenic beauty. I have this childlike fascination for window seat whether it is a train or a plane. After all, one has this feeling somewhere buried in one's heart-"dil to bachcha hai jee", esp. in midlife.
Here are a few lines in the form of reflection on the view outside-


Drifting Clouds

From the height of ten thousand feet, I saw-

Drifting clouds light and puffed

Poised midway between land and sky.

An irresistible desire filled in me-

To touch and float with them

And to do a round of waltz over them.

But the reality that they were-

Only fog to melt down in drops of rain

Gave way to the mist in my eyes,

When far below I caught sight of-

The manmade concrete blocks of buildings

Encroaching the God made serene green nature.

Tearful clouds dispersed to show me-

The once brimming river thinning down

In a thread like filament on brown patches.

Yet shimmering like gold in the dazzling sunshine,

As if defying man’s feigned ego to win nature.

Till then the plane had risen to thirty thousand feet,

And the view of this war between man and nature

Blurred out from me with a vast sea of clouds to see.  

UNEARTHING MYSELF

On 16th, I, with Sammi went to Bangalore International Airport to see off Mani at 7.00 in the morning. It was cold and windy when we arrived there. Earlier, seeing off always made me go weak and shaky from inside. But this past year, we have been through this for so many times that it seemed just a normal routine or I might have grown strong, transformed facing and enduring the challenges of life that I maintained my calm.

After seeing him off, my guru- Sammi 'my youngest son'- as I call him sometimes because he is the one who has inspired me to take my neglected dreams off of the back burner and to cast off the old constraints, we had coffee together out there in the open space enjoying the bright and sunny morning doing some life sketches. It had been ages unable to recall when I did the last one. I felt a little let down on my self confidence. However, I tried to brush it up with Sammi at my side to motivate me. Though my eye to hand coordination was not so good yet I liked what I did

Jeevan ka sach

Out there on the roof for a morning walk, the cool, crisp air at times carries me back to the jungle of past memories but then they only bring tears into my tired eyes, seeking answers to some unresolved questions- Why it is so that the absence of one person makes one feel life as incomplete- this feeling never lets you live freely as the bitter truth keeps coming back to you that you are bound to live with this loss forever....... it hurts so much.